I haven't written for some time and I am choosing to write in a non-ordinary to me blogging environment because I am moved to share what I am witnessing. I am sitting in Peet's Coffee as I wait for a meeting and utilize their Internet, soy white chocolate mochas, and hazelnut blueberry muffins. It is impossible to not be aware of the other patrons as most of them are speaking in tones so loud and abrasive that I try to will them to lower themselves. This behavior crosses gender, racial, ethnic and generational lines. The common denominator seems to be the desire to be heard and the competitive...I can't even get the words out because the voices are so damn loud.
My horoscope for this week said that I am to use my intuition to observe my society and share these observations, leading to a deeper level of creative understanding of their functions. I remember this as I listen to these people. I practice extending compassion to them as a redemptive function. I do not wish to allow myself to be upset my their lack of awareness. It's a cafe, I think. Folks should be talking, sharing and learning from each other in such an environment. Yet, why are they so loud? Are they trying to drown out existential, non-ambient noise, including machines, each other, closely situated seating? Who are the minority who talk quietly amongst themselves? They do not exist in this space. The people who are alone are absorbed in some task-reading, staring into the black abyss of their cell phones, talking on their phones.
Most of the people who are listening in conversations are intermittently staring off into space. I've picked out my favorite-the elder man in the cap and MIT sweatshirt, reading a new release physics book, talking about travails or taravails to his partner in conversation, who is staring off into space. The speakers are unphased by the listener's lack of attention, indicating their primary need is to be heard, to be seen. I think of the title of this blog and my memoir, 'To Be Seen' and am aware of how the being seen that I am talking about is miles apart from the physical function of seeing something, say with one's eyes. I am talking about seeing something or someone (including oneself) with your heart and your soul that enables the receiver to state, "I feel seen by you". The type of perception and listening that requires one to get themselves, their needs and their judgments out of the way long enough to glimpse into who another truly is and to accept such.
I am seeing these people in this cafe and I am accepting them for who they appear to be, who they may be. I may not like how loud they talk, or what they have to say, but I can still respect them as human beings with love. I guarantee you that before I leave, at least one person will approach me and ask me a question of some sort. This has already occurred four times today. Why wouldn't they consult the employees of this establishment, you might ask? I believe it is because they get that I hold this love for them and gravitate to a person they intuit will actually help them. And they will tell me how rare it is that a stranger would help them and actually give them helpful, accurate information. And I will sigh and wonder why folks are this way these days. Not because I am depressed and think negatively of my fellow human, but because I sincerely want to know.
I want to know how I can help these people and how I can help our society as a whole get along better. I want to inspire someone who asks me for help to help another, as we continue to spread kindness and concern like wildfire in a desert of apathy and despair. I want to encourage individuals to connect with each other in person, in real time and be unafraid to present and be whom they truly are. This allows all of us to see and be seen so much more easily. There are no masks needed to guise a soul who lives in truth and encourages that of other. Underneath the feelings of lack and fears of not being enough which we all endure, there are all the people in your life who truly love you and support you living in your highest truth. Those who do not, do not belong in your life.
This is a simple compass I use to determine who to spend my time with and environments to spend my time in. While places like Peet's Coffee can be mined for sociological observations and generalized freak shows, they are not organic farms, beach sunsets, dew-drenched redwoods, and music-filled natural amphitheaters. The concrete jungle does not hold the negative ions that moving water and nature do, no matter how we try and no matter how enticing a city might be. That is not to say that a balance of varied environments is not excellent fodder for creativity and genius. The point is that, all too often, nature is removed from the palette and similarly in places like Half Moon Bay, city trips are desperately needed to balance the hill billy credo. The point is: balance is needed, plain and simple. These are not new ideas, they are merely the pondering of my mind and the product of Peet's Coffee in Half Moon Bay and the feelings that induces.
There is gold in these hills and it is spiritual in nature. It can only be minded by the esoterically rich and only in one place for so long. So, keep moving, keep your compassionate lenses on and allow yourself to get out of the way long enough to truly see another and yourself. There is no need to speak so loud when what we have to say is the product of silence and contemplation.
Be well in your love,
Tara
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